Three Ways to Teach Your Child Self-Advocacy

Your child needs to learn to self-advocate to communicate with others, become independent, and grow into a self-sufficient young person. Self-advocacy includes taking responsibility for speaking up for yourself, knowing how to seek help when needed, and listening to others. Helping your child learn how to express their needs and desires will build the foundation for confidence and self-awareness as they grow older. Here are three ways to help your child develop this important skill:

1. Learn How to Ask

Often, children have a hard time identifying what is wrong or what they need. Teach your child to express why they want or need something. If they ask for something, prompt them to express why they are asking. That way, you are guiding them to first consider, and then communicate, their needs in a given situation. Encourage them to express their needs both inside and outside of the house. For young children, it can be helpful to offer them scripted words or phrases to use.

2. Take Responsibility

When children have tasks they can successfully complete, their confidence grows. Try giving your child regular chores or a short list of responsibilities to complete daily. Learning how to handle and practice responsibility positively will build your child’s self-esteem.

3. Talk About Strengths and Weaknesses

One thing that can help young people self-advocate is knowing their own strengths and weaknesses. Consider different kinds of strengths, and point these out to your child regularly. Take note of their successes! Likewise, being aware of areas for growth is helpful for children. If they are aware of their weaknesses, they can better communicate with teachers and other adults about challenges. Always frame discussions of weaknesses with a “growth mindset”—encouragement will help build your child’s confidence!

Above all, observe and communicate! Learning to self-advocate depends on conversations with parents and role models, as well as consistent encouragement. Give your child the language and the confidence to ask for what they need—and watch their self-advocacy grow.